Parenting Therapy
in Palo Alto & Del Mar, CA
Are You Struggling With Your Little Ones Or Teenagers?
Feeling nervous or insecure about becoming a new parent?
Worried about repeating your parents’ mistakes?
Parenting a child who is very different from you?
It is normal to feel insecure about parenting. Not only for new parents, but also as your child grows older because every age is a first for you. And children, if you have more than one, are not all alike. Modifying the parenting approach from one child to another can be necessary. Taking a rigid approach to parenting can backfire. Instead, being open and vulnerable about having some concerns, just means that you are an open and caring person who may benefit from a parent coach from time to time. Just like we see our pediatrician for medical or developmental issues, we can also seek help from a parent coach or new parent therapy to get input on different approaches to your particular child given your individual issues.
Have any questions? Send me a message!
You Are Not Alone With Your Concerns
Wondering how to best parent is completely normal and parenting therapy can help.
Asking for parent coaching is a sign of strength in that you can acknowledge that it is okay to be insecure and not know everything, and it is okay to ask for help. This is of course also really great modeling even if your child doesn’t know that you are. But sometimes, it could even be helpful for your child to know that you have consulted with a professional. It sends the message that you really care. Sometimes, you may even ask your child what would be most helpful to them. This can make your child feel important and gives them a sense of agency in their own lives. The solution is a collaborative approach where you and your child feel held and you have a place to bring your concerns and try them out with your child. If you find yourself regularly “losing it” over your child’s temper tantrums; or lying awake wondering why your teenager refuses to talk to you, you are part of the parent community. Questioning why your child reacts so differently when you think you have been completely reasonable? Realizing you just acted the way your parent did when you were a child and feeling terrible about that?
There is help. I have raised four children of my own. I am knowledgeable about child development and how to help you be the kind of parent you strive to be. After all, parenting is not about never making mistakes. Making repairs goes a long way. Together we figure out what will work for you and your child.
How Does Parent Coaching Or Parent Therapy Help Exactly?
The saying “it takes a village to raise a child” may not necessarily be true, but it certainly helps to have community and support for parenting. It is one of the hardest jobs, and also one of the most important. The fact that you are here means you are a caring, loving parent who wants to do best by your child. I have so much respect for that.
Parenting therapy helps when we collaboratively investigate your personal questions or concerns about struggling to best parent your individual child. You are the expert on you and you know your child best, so a thorough examination of where you feel insecure about your parenting will be a first step. While I am a proponent of structured parenting, sometimes we have to modify our parenting strategies a bit during certain phases. Parenting is about structure with flexibility. This is not confusing for children, it just means they can rely on you to negotiate when needed. Through parent therapy you can learn how to resolve conflicts with your child, help them develop and grow to their fullest potential and help you feel good about your role. Parenting therapy is like having a little extra help when you feel stuck with your child. We have all been in a position of wondering how to best parent from time to time, and talking to friends, family or a parent coach can be very valuable. Parenting counseling can be part of the village part.
Common Questions About Parenting Therapy
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They can definitely try us! It is difficult to think of obstinance and refusal as their healthy way of defining themselves as separate from you. When you're late for work, needing to get things done in a timely manner, and they are doing everything they can to sabotage you. This can happen even for their own joyful events like an outing or a playdate with a friend. Helping you better understand their developmental process and how to navigate these situations, while also taking care of yourself and limit setting, can be a focus of parent therapy.
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I often say, when your teenager opens up and talks to you, stop in your tracks and listen. Because yes, it is true, they don’t always share a lot. You may find yourself constantly checking with them and it seems like it goes in one ear, out the other. This doesn’t mean you stop asking. They notice that you care even if it doesn’t seem that way or they act as if you are bothering them. But not checking in is worse. They definitely notice that. Sullenness or quiet defiance is more indicative of adolescence than the temper tantrums of toddler hood obviously. But it is also a way to assert their individuality. Parenting is not for the faint of heart and parenting coaching or parenting therapy can help.
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I have always been interested in child development and grew up with a pediatrician father. Having raised four children, all different from one another, has of course also given me experiences. I’ve made PLENTY of mistakes, but I did learn a lot from my children’s responses to me. In parenting coaching with me, I will listen to and respect what is important to you and values you would like to pass on. Then we work collaboratively to help you be the parent you strive to be. I have also helped adults and older adults better connect with their adult children later in life. I had powerful healing conversations with my own elderly father later in life and that was invaluable to me. There is always time for repair.
When Is The Right Time To Start Parenting Therapy?
Anytime is the right time and now is the right time if you are looking at this page. There is no such thing as “too late”. Repair is always possible. Please reach out for a brief consultation. I’m looking forward to hearing from you.
